time flies when you're avoiding your blog...

Well will ya look at that... I haven't blogged since June! I am sure you have all been hanging in suspense to hear the ending of my tale of my father's death...
well hang no longer...
So where was I..
Oh yes. First day in a foreign land with strangers or some such thing...

The following morning I awoke at 5 am and didn't quite know where I was at first. To me it felt like I had slept in late, since I was still on EST. I was at a loss and could not bring myself to just lay there, so I got up and cleaned the guest bathroom. I waited for the girls to get up and had some coffee and prepared myself for going to my dad's trailer.
When we arrived at his trailer park it all seemed so surreal. It was so hard to walk into the home of the man I barely knew. What would I find? My father was always a tidy, proud man and I was a bit surprised at the neglect of housework. I knew his bad health was the cause. He had been ill a few years and had had a quadruple bypass two years prior. His clothes and shoes however were immaculate. He had always been a snazzy dresser. He had more suits, boots and shoes than anyone I have ever known. He was a charmer and dressed the part wherever he went.
I really did not know where to start with his belongings. I knew they had to go, but had no clue how I would do it all in less than a week. I started to go through paperwork and looking for precious photos of those relatives in Hungary I knew much of nothing about. I found them straightaway thankfully. I also found every single card, letter or picture I had sent him over the years. All the grand kids he never met smiling at him in those photos, my wedding photos and invitation, postcards from places I had been....
I sat and had a good cry....
His gf, sisters and bro-in-law were a gigantic help through it all. They knew some people that would come and remove some things and helped to pack the rest of it up. Dad's neighbors helped out and took some things they could use also. We got a lot done that first day.
The following day was a small memorial service in the park community room. Some of dad's friends came to share stories and pay respects. One friend he played cards with wrote him a poem. Another read a passage from a book. I had brought along pictures and we made a nice display with scrabble tiles and his bowling gear. Dad loved both. Everyone told me how proud he would have been of me for taking care of everything in the end. They made me proud of my father for having been such a good friend to them. He was always there to help people when they needed something built like a deck or ramp.
It gave me a whole new view of my father.
I managed to somehow get everything taken care of and made new friends and family in the process. As well as having some fun! His gf and her family were wonderful people and were such a help to me. It takes big hearts to let someone they have never met into their homes and to give them so much help. I would never have been able to do it without their support and the support of my family.
Sometimes I am still expecting that phone call that I may or may not ignore and then I realize it will never come again.

Obviously it takes a death to make me blog again....

I have become a horrible blogger. Hard to believe with the blogger I used to be...

These days it takes something major (or major boredom) to make me blog again.

This one was a biggie....

A month ago I got a text from my newly reacquainted brother that started out fine, and then he said he had to tell me something about Dad. I knew right away what it would be. My father had died two weeks prior to my brother finally being tracked down. All that week, before I had found out, I had had a nagging feeling about my dad and I knew there was something wrong. The biggest thing on my mind was what would I do if he died? How would I get to California? How could I possibly afford to? How could my family live without me if I had to leave suddenly? Who would take care of Zion? Well, we would soon find out...
I took on the responsibilities of next of kin and started making arrangements. The sheriff's office of Riverside had been brought in to find the next of kin, so I had to deal with them and the coroner. My dad had a girlfriend who had been in limbo for two weeks not being able to do a thing since she was not considered next of kin. She did not know how to contact us. My father had been in the coroners office for two weeks. I spoke with her and reassured her I would get things taken care of. It took me two days to make arrangements for cremation and to make travel plans. I was an absolute wreck during this whole time, but I somehow managed to pull it together. This was tough, considering I had not seen my father in 16 years and I talked to him only a few times a year.
On June 10th I flew to California. The trip out was horrible due to problems at the airport and almost missing my flight. Then when I got to Ontario and went to pick up my rental car they told me I needed an extra hundred dollars to deposit that I did not have! I was furious, hysterical and stranded. I called my dad's gf and asked her to come rescue me. She and her two sisters came to get me. I had never gotten hotel reservations due to lack of money and was going to wing it when I got there. Either staying at my dad's trailer or getting a hotel. The girls told me I had to come home with them. She had an extra room I was welcome to. This was a huge relief and just the fact that they were so welcoming and warm to me made me feel so much better and I accepted their offer. We went to the crematorium to pick up my father's belongings and then to her house for dinner and drinks. Oh and we got pulled over for speeding on the way and got off due to our sob story!
I immediately felt at home when we got there. She had a ton of cats, dogs and two goats! Being a farm girl and animal lover, I fit right in. The three sisters and I hit it off immediately. His GF and I had lots in common and she was only ten years older than me. GO dad who was 71! We sat around drank and ate and told stories. I had brought a ton of pictures to share so we looked through them. I was exhausted from the travel and the time change so we ended the night pretty early. We had a big day the next day.

I think I will stop the story there for the time. It is still hard to think about it all. I will say that it hit me worse when I got back home. The last few weeks have been rough and I am just getting back to myself.
I will continue the story soon~